Producer: Suresh Jethani
Director: Kirti Kumar
*ing: Govinda, Raveena Tandon, Harish, Kadar Khan, Mohnish Behl, Anupam Kher, Raza Murad
Music: Anand Milind

Released on : May 01, 1998


Reviewed by: Anjali Abrol
dilwaliji@indolink.com


out of 

HOSPITAL FOOD...*STARRING* HIJRA NO. 1, DITZ NO.1, 4 LOSERS-ALL VYING FOR THE JHALLA/JHALLI NO. 1 POSITIONS, BUDHA NO. 1, BOYTOY NO. 1, PARSHAANI NO. 1 & DALER MEHNDI NO 1.

Why hospital food? You know how you are in the hospital, singing "Mai kahan hu, mai kaun hu?" while the hospital keeps stuffing you with some horrific substance called hospital food, and it lacks all of the masala your mummy's samosa has? Yes, even the salt...(reason being in hospital...you thought you were Aamir Khan in Andaz Apna Apna and were following your "Raveeeeeeeena from London" and shweet Raveeeeeena beats you on the head with a stick--so much for deewane!) and the food is so horrific that they have to stick that uhhmm darn needle in your arm so you don't pass out from the poisonous food and no matter how hard you try, you can't pull that uhhmm darn thing out?

Horrible, huh?

Aunty No. 1....painful.....ears were disappointed due to lack of humorous jokes (as opposed to timepass jokes--smile sympathetically at the fool telling such stupid "jokes")...eyes were losing sight of the big thing changing from Govinda to that darn aunty....brainache (trying to keep track of those ridiculous "conflicts"...)...

Movie starts out with Hijra No. 1's bhabhi (Bindu--of Judwaa "fame") claiming that Gopi (Govinda) is basically a loser (surprise surprise). In the quest for success and fame, he goes to movie producers...meets up with Parshaani No. 1 of Hi Hi Productions (Satish Kaushik), some laughs, blahblah.

Second conflict. Runs over Ditz No. 1(Raveena), who ran away from home so she didn't have to marry villian Boytoy No. 1 (Mohnish Behl--even Madhuri preferred Salman, bechara reject...). She was told by Anupam Kher that she was destined to marry Ranjeet Saigal (sounds like an "Oyyyyye Ranjeet-ah!). Smart, beautiful, and talented as she is, the fool went to look for her Oy Ranjeet-a, found Govinda, blahblah. Oh right...her dad's a villian (that Raza Murad stud).

Third conflict. Govinda sees a murder by Raza. Govinda's innocent bhai works for him and catches him doing not so innocent things. POLICE POLICE! bhaiji yells. Let's steal that Bunty kid, Raza growls. Kid gone, no tears shed.

Fourth. Govinda has loser friends who are after loser girls (Jhalle No. 1's), whatever their names are--uhhmm Harish and uhhmm Rohit someone of Aazmayish "fame"....connected eyebrow boys--uhmm attractive indeed. They are after two total idiots, who are Budha No. 1's (Kadar Khan) something or another. Here enters Aunty No. 1, as Maharani Sahiba... and there goes Kadar Khan's dil, as well as some other old guy's. Yeck.

*Vaise main frush-trated ladki hoon.....*
Confused? Good, you are ready for the movie. Too confused to care less to figure out any of it? Good, don't waste your time. What a brainache. *Frush- trated bahut hoge*

How about this:

Best Dialogue:
Satish Kaushik as the frush-trated director of Hi Hi Productions:
Vaise toh main frush-trated aadmi hoon...
Story ka pata nahin.
Finance ka thikana nahin.
Hero dates nahin deta.
Heroine kehti hai poore kapde pehnegi.

Best Dance: Aunty No. 1 title song...hmm Govinda puts our DhakDhak ladkiyan to shame...perhaps some of them ought to take lessons (Sushimushi, Raveena, and half the rest of the industry.)

BEST PART OF THE WHOLE FILM: Just watch the Daler Mehndi No.1 on the motorcycle. WOW! Talk about funny. Enough said.

Best Clothes: All of Govinda's (and Govindi's) attire.

Best Direction: When the plots shift so fast you lose Raveena for about 2 hours until she giggles and thumkas again and you wonder who she was again.

Dance choreography was blah ('cept for Govinda, of course) as well as the songs themselves. Harish, his bud Rohit or whoever, and their two talented bimbos need to stop inhaling helium and let Raveena use it instead, as well as her Claritin-D. Govinda makes a sexy aunty (ah ha ha ha right); the attire, as usual, needs HELP (Raveena had like two decent outfits--incidently they were Indian clothing), dialogue needed a lil more humor (it's supposed to make you uhhmm laugh, right????), and the movie needs a real story or no story, not a mix of both. And what's the deal with that copy of Beta's Dhak Dhak Karne Laga???? Puh-lease! Raveena only wishes she was Madhuri!

Something was missing in this "comedy". Seems as if Govinda's comedy is gettin' a lil old lately and he needs to remix a bit (note Banarasi Babu) or his next will be Flop No. 1. Govinda's a great actor (Deewana Mastana was one of his better releases) but he lacked the enthusiasm and delivery he usually captivates the audience with (must be those tight saris and cholis the flamboyant bechara is forced to wear). As usual, Raveena the challi was wasted as a heroine (note heroine and not actress, the difference being talent defining in the latter). Those four fools (Jhalle No. 1's) were so bad I cried for the industry. Where are Shakti Kapoor and Anupam Kher when you need them? Kadar Khan didn't help the movie any. He seemed so forced, so unnatural, that I was disappointed in his performance, being a great actor he is. (Well, if I had to pursue a crossdresser like Mamta Kulkarni, I would be hesitant as well). I thought Aunty No. 1 was going to be similar to Chachi 420...I cried again in disappointment. Satish Kaushik was one of the highlights of the film, his humor saving the movie from total depression. Now that sardarji on the motorcycle....that guy deserves an applause....vah! Kya dialogue tha!

Verdict: Bland Hospital Food
Watch Chachi 420 instead.


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