Hello, my name is Roger (really Rajeev Kripalani) at (fill in the name of any multinational multi-gazillion dollar American corporation that is making use of the strong dollar to provide cost effective customer service to people in AmericaâŠwhew). Please donât let my faux American accent throw you off or disturb you in any way. Sure, I talk like a stereotypical American cowboy, but hey you understand me right? You know what Iâm âsayinâ? If Iâm âlyinâ Iâm âdyinâ! OMG, FYI, I am here to help you and show you the subtle ways of Ghandigiri. So, tell me your problems? Wait, did I tell you that I want to visit America some day? But, just a visitâŠfor India is rocking right now! Whatâs that? You donât say rocking over there in AmrikaâŠerâŠI mean America? Well how aboutâŠmind blowing? No? HmmmâŠokâŠso let me tell you a little something, before I answer your questions. I work during the night. My shift starts at nine p.m. and goes on till three a.m. at which point my friends and I head to a nearby bar to hookup! Yeah man, itâs awesome. I sleep during the day, take American English classes and get paid an obscene amount for someone who still lives with his parents. You know what that means donât you? PARTY!!!
What? You say that you have a problem? Technical Support? Customer Service? East or West, India is the best! But first, let me tell you about the fun and catchy soundtrack for Hello by fun ânâ perky music directors Sajid-Wajid. The movie is based on the best selling novel, âOne Night at the Call Centreâ by author Chetan Bhagat (Played in the film by Bollywood superstar Salman Khan, thatâs Simon Cowell to you) that follows the lives of six individuals working at a typical call center. Call centers have created a sub-culture in India, as youngsters suddenly find themselves with a lot of disposable cash, hookups between married/unmarried people are common and dreams of an American lifestyle in India become a reality. Bet you didnât know all this is going on behind the scenes of your call for help! Directed by Atul Agnihotri (âDil Ne Jise Apna Kahaâ), âHelloâ transforms the novel from the written word to the moving screen.
Hello? Hello yaarâŠerâŠI mean friend! Donât tell me your problem yet. First let me tell you a little bit about Sajid-Wajid, who bounce back with this soundtrack after the dismal âGod Tussi Great Hoâ. The music directors responsible for last yearâs mega hit âPartnerâ are back in fine form joined by Jalees Sherwani who provides the lyrics. YeahâŠyeahâŠI know you have a problem, but by the end of this conversation youâll see that âHelloâ is a pretty catchy soundtrack with some gems on it.
This call may be recorded for quality control, as long as I, your friendly neighborhood operator Rajee..er I mean Roger can maintain the quality of my answers. Here, letâs listen to the first track off the soundtrack, âHello Title Trackâ. Itâs the perfect backdrop to the hectic craziness of the call center. Hey, I know, why donât we combine a call center with a club? That way, I can answer your call, drink a pegâŠumm..I mean six-pack, and dance to the tune of this track. What saves this from mediocrity is the musical arrangement, which is slightly familiar, yet fresh enough to keep the listener interested. Yeah, letâs grind baby! Staccato dance beats combine with ringing bells and synth effects for cool background music, but nothing that would make you really hit the repeat button in any way. Vocals by Wajid, Suzy Q, Ishq Bector, Herchelle, Merlin and Tim are good and they really try best, but somehow fall a bit short. Check out the remix âHello Party Mixâ for a livelier version of the song. This one wonât help me solve your problem in any way, but please listen to it while I put you on hold.
Ok, while the R.A. (Resident American) is on hold, letâs move on the next track which is the best of the album, âRab Ka Bandaâ. This hypnotic song, immediately grabs the listener by the ear and pulls them into the ambience created by the Sufi-trance beat. Sonu Nigam, Zubin Garg, and Sundhi Chauhan provide the memorable vocals that express the wonderful lyrics by Jalees Sherwani. This one is not to be missed. Add it to your playlist immediately and hit that repeat button for a track that will enchant you.
WAKE UP! Ok, let me look up your account and see whatâs going on. I may or may not be able to answer your question, but I guarantee to try my best. Okee Dokee! Next up is âMitwa Reâ which is not for the jaded listener in that on the surface it may seem like a by the books romantic ballad that relies on a melody that invokes the feeling of rustic India. Sure it does all that, but the singing by Shaan (excellent as always) and Sadhna Sargam combines with a fresh musical arrangement to really melt even the most jaded of hearts. The lyrics by Jalees Sherwani may not be too deep, but they fit the mood that the melody is trying to convey. Mitwa may be one of the most over used of words, but this track hits the heart the right way. Worth adding to your playlist for a short time, but donât expect to be listening to this track a few months down the line.
Look, I canât see what your problem is, so Iâm going to get my manager Samir DaveâŠoops I mean Samuel Davidson to come on the line and say, âYo, whatâs up?!?â
Ahem, hello! How can I, Samuel (but you can call me Sam) help you? Oh yes, I see what your problem is, but before I suggest any superb out of this world OMG advice, I feel compelled to tell you about the next track on the album, âCaravanâ which along with âRab Ka Bandaâ is another standout on the soundtrack. The lyrical depth is provided by Jalees Sherwani and makes the listener move with emotion. The singing is top notch by Shafqat Amanat Ali Khan whose exotic pronunciation of the word caravan really grabs the listener. Sajid -Wajid hit a high note here by letting this track breathe without feeling the need to over orchestrate. Now, donât get so upset, Iâm trying to help you; canât you feel the spirit of call center Bollywood? Thatâs right, youâve got to understand, here in India we do things a bit differently!
Dil pe mat le yaarâŠ.haath meâŠerâŠI mean, donât take your problem to heart sir, itâs going to be perfectly okay as we are here to solve your problem! Next up on our âHelloâ audio journey is what should be considered the call center national anthem what with all the different hookups going on. After all, put a bunch of apna desi youth together in a room and mix it up like samosa chat and you have all the makings of a tasty masala bhel mix! âBang Bang Bangâ is a stadium rock anthem with guitar licks and riffs that are perfectly made to cash in on the rock craze that has been triggered by the success of âRock Onâ. Salman Khan gyrates on screen to Sajidâs rocking voice and this is one of those trashy tunes that will have you bopping your head while hitting the repeat button.
All in all, the album has some standout tracks worth adding to your playlist for a month or so before you send them to that great big deleted song list in the sky. Add âRab Ka Bandaâ, âCaravanâ and âBang Bang Bangâ to your playlist, enjoy them for a while and be thankful that the next time your call to customer service goes through, you are helping the economy of apna great India! Ahem, sir, I thank you for your call, sorry I couldnât help you, but Bollywood calls, and I am off to become the next Shah Rukh Khan! I, Samuel Davidson aka Samir Dave am signing, over and out.